The Twins

I'm not really sure why, but I have a weird infatuation with twins. I think they are freaks of nature. Well, no... not freaks. But just really cool. The fact that there are two people that shared the womb together AND look alike, I find that really cool. Every time I meet twins, I inform them of my love of twins... preferably identical ones. I always ask if they switched places just to screw with people. If I had a twin, I'd make her take tests for me. Hopefully she's smart.

I have a pair of friends. They are twins. I somewhat regularly draw attention to the fact that they resemble one another. I also attempt to play them against each other like, "if you don't call me back you won't be my favorite twin anymore." Truthfully, I do not have a favorite because they are very special in their own ways. It's cute because they drive to school together. They often share things. They are virtually the same person in my eyes,... but not. (One is married... which makes it totally hilarious when teachers see them sit next to one another... they look alike BUT HAVE DIFFERENT LAST NAMES. It's the funniest thing you ever saw.)

Whenever I see something about twins on tv or read about twins in magazines, I like to share it with them. One day I was watching this documentary on these sets of twins and they were so competitive with one another that they drove each other to have eating disorders. One weighed like 86lbs. and the other 73lbs, and the 86-pounder was pissed that she was the "fat twin." I warned my dear Twins of this unfortunate story and helped by giving them advice. I believe my note ended with something along the lines of "love each other and eat hamburgers."

The other day when I got to school, the twins were staring at me. I was concerned that something was on my face, or my clothes didn't match or something... but soon I got a better look at the twins. They watched me enter the room, walk up the steps, make it all the way to my seat and I was like what?

Then twin #2 said, "Just say it already?"
To which I had no idea what she was talking about. "Say what, twin #2?"
"Make a remark about the fact we are dressed alike."
"OHHHHH. Well I had noticed... did your mother dress you today?"

We are still friends. I love my twins. And I like to hope they love me. To the twins, if you are reading this... GET A WORKING CELL PHONE AND CALL ME BACK PLAYAS..... OH AND HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS.

P.S. Twin #1 used to kick Twin #2 in the face while in the womb... so Twin #2 had brown teeth as a tot. Rude.

P.S.S. The day they dressed alike, I made them take a picture. They were less than pleased.